Total Twaddle

Funzone. => Funny Twaddle => Topic started by: Nana of 8 on November 09, 2016, 22:03:30 PM

Title: Governmentium
Post by: Nana of 8 on November 09, 2016, 22:03:30 PM
Oxford University researchers have discovered the heaviest element yet known to science. The new element, Governmentium (symbol=Gv), has one neutron, 25 assistant neutrons, 88 deputy neutrons and 198 assistant deputy neutrons, giving it an atomic mass of 312. These 312 particles are held together by forces called morons.

Since Governmentium has no electrons, it is inert. However, it can be detected, because it impedes every reaction with which it comes into contact. A tiny amount can cause a reaction that would normally take less than a second, to take from 4 days to 4 years to complete. Governmentium has a normal halflife of 2 to 6 years. It does not decay, but instead undergoes a reorganization in which a portion of the assistant neutrons and deputy neutrons exchange places.

In fact, its mass will actually increase over time, since each reorganization will cause more morons to become neutrons, forming isodopes. This characteristic of moron promotion leads some scientists to believe that Governmentium is formed whenever morons reach a critical concentration. This hypothetical quantity is referred to as a critical morass. When catalysed with money, Governmentium becomes Administratium (symbol=Ad), an element that radiates just as much energy as Governmentium, since it has twice as many morons.
Title: Re: Governmentium
Post by: fred on November 10, 2016, 07:40:49 AM
Title: Re: Governmentium
Post by: K@ on November 11, 2016, 20:40:50 PM
I can get the science, there.  :)