Author Topic: praise for answered prayers  (Read 1152 times)

0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.

Offline fred

  • Is old for the day....
  • Global Mod
  • At One With Twaddle
  • ********
  • Posts: 66996
  • Gender: Male
  • Mr Greybeard.
    • cymrogwyllt
praise for answered prayers
« on: August 03, 2013, 16:00:16 PM »
 The pastor asked if anyone in the congregation would like to express praise for answered prayers. This lady stood and walked to the podium. She said, "I have a praise.
Two months ago, my husband, Pete, had a terrible bicycle wreck and his scrotum was completely crushed. The pain was excruciating and the doctors didn't know if they could help him."
You could hear a muffled gasp from the men in the congregation as they imagine the pain that poor Pete must have experienced. "Pete was unable to hold me or the children," she went on, "and every move caused him terrible pain."
We prayed as the doctors performed a delicate operation, and it turned out they were able to piece together the crushed remnants of Pete's scrotum, and wrap wire around it to hold it in place."
Again, the men in the congregation cringed and squirmed uncomfortably as they imagined the horrible surgery performed on Pete.
"Now," she announced in a quivering voice, "thank the Lord, Pete is out of the hospital and the doctors say that with time, his scrotum should recover completely."
All the men sighed with unified relief. The pastor rose and tentatively asked if anyone else had something to say.

A man stood up and walked slowly to the podium.















He said, "I'm Pete." The entire congregation held its breath.
"I just want to tell my wife the word is sternum."
Gym?  Thought you said Gin.

Offline K@

  • Rump.
  • Non Stop Talker
  • ******
  • Posts: 23263
  • Gender: Male
Re: praise for answered prayers
« Reply #1 on: August 04, 2013, 08:35:53 AM »
Ha!
The trouble with cats is that they've got no tact. - P. G. Wodehouse

Offline Nana of 8

  • Mother of some little breeders ;)
  • Non Stop Talker
  • ******
  • Posts: 23678
  • Gender: Female
  • Vaccinated with a Gramophone Needle
Re: praise for answered prayers
« Reply #2 on: August 05, 2013, 20:08:49 PM »
 :laugh:
Queen Ebayer

Women and cats will do as they please, and men and dogs should relax and get used to the idea.