Author Topic: Is this the worst yet?  (Read 24792 times)

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Offline K@

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Re: Is this the worst yet?
« Reply #15 on: August 17, 2014, 20:40:13 PM »
Careful, Fred... I smiled, then. :)
The trouble with cats is that they've got no tact. - P. G. Wodehouse

Offline fred

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Re: Is this the worst yet?
« Reply #16 on: August 18, 2014, 07:29:03 AM »
Condoms don’t guarantee safe sex anymore….. A friend of mine was wearing one when he was shot by the woman’s husband.
I jumped off a bridge in Paris.

They told me I was in seine

Offline K@

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Re: Is this the worst yet?
« Reply #17 on: August 18, 2014, 11:17:12 AM »
 :o
The trouble with cats is that they've got no tact. - P. G. Wodehouse

Offline fred

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Re: Is this the worst yet?
« Reply #18 on: August 24, 2014, 15:34:04 PM »
I had bubble and squeak for breakfast this morning.











Now the wife has told me to go and get the kids two new hamsters.......
I jumped off a bridge in Paris.

They told me I was in seine

Offline Tāf

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Re: Is this the worst yet?
« Reply #19 on: September 09, 2014, 12:29:40 PM »
Teacher: If you were a great composer, where would you live?

Boy: In A Flat.

Offline fred

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Re: Is this the worst yet?
« Reply #20 on: September 13, 2014, 16:51:01 PM »
Did you hear about the Italian chef who died last week? He pasta way
I jumped off a bridge in Paris.

They told me I was in seine

Offline fred

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Re: Is this the worst yet?
« Reply #21 on: September 18, 2014, 18:28:51 PM »
Business Man in 1st Class, to a Sexy Gorgeous Air Hostess:


Business Man: What is your name?
Hostess: Angela Benz, Sir!

Business Man: Lovely name, any relation to Mercedes Benz?

Hostess: Yes Sir

Business Man: How?


Hostess: Same price!
I jumped off a bridge in Paris.

They told me I was in seine

Offline fred

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Re: Is this the worst yet?
« Reply #22 on: September 20, 2014, 08:03:29 AM »
 A bloke is walking past a prison wall....


 when a dwarf comes flying over the wall and lands on the pavement by him.

    "don't worry" says the dwarf "I'm only a little condecending"

I jumped off a bridge in Paris.

They told me I was in seine

Offline Tāf

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Re: Is this the worst yet?
« Reply #23 on: September 21, 2014, 17:38:20 PM »
Mama Mia - classic Abba song or Yorkshire kid telling his Mother he's arrived?

Offline fred

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Re: Is this the worst yet?
« Reply #24 on: September 25, 2014, 07:51:48 AM »
A cannibal passed his brother in the woods.
I jumped off a bridge in Paris.

They told me I was in seine

Offline Tāf

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Re: Is this the worst yet?
« Reply #25 on: September 28, 2014, 10:51:09 AM »
Jousting.

Said the Brummie to the Bee.

Offline fred

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Re: Is this the worst yet?
« Reply #26 on: October 04, 2014, 15:21:25 PM »
A man walks in to the doctor's and says "Doctor doctor  I've got a piece of lettuice sticking out of my bum"

The doctor has a look and says "It's the tip of the iceberg"
« Last Edit: October 05, 2014, 07:03:07 AM by fred »
I jumped off a bridge in Paris.

They told me I was in seine

Offline K@

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Re: Is this the worst yet?
« Reply #27 on: October 04, 2014, 20:40:37 PM »
"liece of lettuice" was quite funny, at least... ;)
The trouble with cats is that they've got no tact. - P. G. Wodehouse

Offline fred

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Re: Is this the worst yet?
« Reply #28 on: October 05, 2014, 07:05:14 AM »
"liece of lettuice" was quite funny, at least... ;)

tylo fixed
I jumped off a bridge in Paris.

They told me I was in seine

Offline K@

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Re: Is this the worst yet?
« Reply #29 on: October 05, 2014, 18:40:21 PM »
"Lettuce" :)
The trouble with cats is that they've got no tact. - P. G. Wodehouse